webshit weekly

An annotated digest of the top "Hacker" "News" posts for the last week of February, 2018.

Hacker News's Undocumented Features and Behaviors
February 22, 2018 (comments)
A Hackernews documents the tribal lore. Hackernews congratulates itself on the uniformity of its outlook and opinions.

Dropbox S-1
February 23, 2018 (comments)
A company that Y Combinator funded accidentally survives. Hackernews splits up into two factions: some Hackernews are angry that rich people have a lot of money, while others scold the first faction for being insufficiently grateful to their corporate benefactors. In a side room, the turbonerds draw the blinds in preparation for an all-night argument about technical minutiae of copying files.

Dropbox saved almost $75M over two years by moving out of AWS
February 24, 2018 (comments)
A webshit takes a minor detail with an obvious outcome from yesterday's story and drags it out into an entire article. Hackernews is quick to warn impressionable bystanders: not using AWS for hosting is a massive risk which will almost certainly get you killed. Attempting to own and operate a non-Macbook computer without first assuming MOPP Level 4 and arranging for AWACS overwatch will result in your business catching physical fire and taking everyone you love with it.

How poverty changes your mindset
February 25, 2018 (comments)
Some academics announce that trying harder makes you dumber, presumably in hopes their parents read the article and stop harassing them about getting real jobs. Hackernews takes turns arguing about who grew up poorer, about who is doing a better job helping homeless people, how many homeless people there even are, why they're poor, why they deserve to be poor, and whether it's even possible to help others, either on a personal or institutional level. No technology is discussed, but a strong contender for Hackernewsest Thread of All Time appears when they begin whining about how nobody listens to work-ethic advice from trust-fund kids.

Apple confirms it uses Google cloud for some of iCloud
February 26, 2018 (comments)
A computer manufacturer purchases internet services from an internet services company. Hackernews speculates on the technical implementations of the webshit, debates the merits of paying people for goods and services, and lists all of the hosting companies it can think of. Lots of Hackernews express confusion regarding Apple's decision to outsource parts of its hosting services, apparently because they don't remember how Xserve went.

Pricing low-touch SaaS
February 27, 2018 (comments)
A webshit drums up business. Hackernews pounces on this opportunity to foist adulation on the Hackernews Popularity Contest bronze medalist, who arrives to scold anyone who questions the groupthink.

Why I Quit Google to Work for Myself
February 28, 2018 (comments)
A webshit quits a job. Hackernews bemoans the fact that it is difficult to trick their managers into valuing their work. Dozens of different approaches are discussed, but it turns out that all managers are terrible at their jobs and can't be trusted. At least, this is the only acceptable answer when faced with the alternative that your years of babysitting a webshit data toilet might not be worth a promotion.