webshit weekly
An annotated digest of the top "Hacker" "News" posts for the third week of September, 2016.
Why building a startup is probably your most sensible career path
September 15, 2016
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Hackernews, while generally agreeing with the idea that not every single human being on earth requires a PhD, gets breathlessly outraged at the idea that it might be possible for anyone who is not a Hackernews to start a business. They caution that it is difficult to be successful without the "right contacts and attitude" (e.g., being a Silicon Valley brogrammer with a trust fund), but concede it's probably worth a shot anyway, since all graduate students die penniless immediately after their thesis defense.
Microservices
September 16, 2016
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Hackernews likes the idea of breaking simple tasks up into a large number of even simpler tasks that can be combined in incredibly complex ways, as this encourages companies to hire more Hackernews, but not require them to be good at anything. A particularly sapient Hackernews mentions that microservices are more successful when deployed by organizations that are already successful. Another one warns of the dangers of needless complexity; fortunately, this one used a throwaway account, and so will not be lynched the next time the npm meetup sees the perpetrator in the Tenderloin.
Twitter: It is too late for it to become the giant people expected
September 17, 2016
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The Economist runs an article describing an event that will not happen, mocking the group of people who thought it would happen. Since Hackernews is the only group of people who thought it would happen, they spend some time complaining it didn't happen because of mismanagement in general, and because Twitter was not nice enough to them in particular.
What San Francisco Says About America
September 18, 2016
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The New York Times -- world's leading authority on San Francisco -- tells us that San Francisco is a microcosm of America. Hackernews spends equal time telling each other how to donate money toward fixing problems and telling each other that donating money will not fix any problems. Nobody realizes Hackernews gen pop is the problem, including the New York Times.
Instant.io – Streaming file transfer over WebTorrent
September 19, 2016
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A Hackernews implements a non-compliant bittorrent client to solve previously-solved problems. Hackernews really dislikes this repetition of work, but is really attracted to any project using a web browser to poorly reimplement functionality.
The Free-Time Paradox in America
September 20, 2016
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Hackernews is concerned that stupid poor people might not realize they are less alive if they choose to entertain themselves instead of working ceaselessly unto death. The behavior of children is held up by the childless as an example for us all. Some dipshit thinks running a website is akin to preagricultural survival. Dimly, a few Hackernews experiment with the idea that money and public acclaim are not the only route to happiness, but this heresy is drowned out by the relentless insistence that being rich is the only way to experience joy.
Nootropics
September 21, 2016
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Hackernews arrives at a consensus: none of them can fall asleep on demand. Several of them posit a theory that it is easier to fall asleep when they are tired. The debate forms around whether chemicals or not being a shiftless loser are superior approaches. No decision is rendered. A Hackernews is unironically directed to Reddit for reliable information about illicit pharmaceuticals.